My Extraordinary (Medical) Adventures: In The World of a Toddler

My Extraordinary (Medical) Adventures: In The World of a Toddler: In 2 months, my toddler has already taught me so much about life! I watch him trot about in his avocado-decorated diaper, unafraid to appear...

In The World of a Toddler

In 2 months, my toddler has already taught me so much about life! I watch him trot about in his avocado-decorated diaper, unafraid to appear silly. He started walking not too long ago so he’s not perfect yet. He still trips and falls every so often, but before you know it, he’s up and running again. I watch how assertive he gets when we negotiate reading vs playtime. He’s a tough cookie and doesn’t let anyone boss him around despite being the youngest human in the house. And to top it all, the boy knows how to get what he wants. He’s quite persistent and doesn’t let obstacles deter him ever. Almost sounds like the perfect adult, right? Yet he’s only 14 months old! I wonder where he gets his confidence from. 

As we celebrated another milestone, I failed to grasp how fast my son is growing. Almost feels like he was born yesterday. As expected in the first 2 years of life, his brain is rapidly developing and creating connections that enable him to do and be who he is day by day. It dawned on me that my toddler probably wakes up with brand new abilities perhaps everyday? Ok maybe not everyday, but pretty often. For example, one day he discovers he can move his fingers in a way he couldn’t before hence can now hold the handle of a cup (fine motor skills). Neat! Or his lips and cheeks can now fold in a new way so he can imitate that phrase mommy always says “no” (communication skills). Let’s think about this for a second. Won’t it be nice to wake up with new “abilities” everyday? The ability to multitask efficiently. To stop procrastinating. To say NO more often (except when it comes to your toddler). Or simply, not fussing over the little things because they work out anyway. I think it would be so amazing. Ok I digressed, but boy, did it feel good!

So back to toddlers! Mine is a ball of energy and sometimes, makes me want to pull my hair out or whatever’s left of it. Never before have I pushed myself to work this sleep deprived. Or had to use my inner genius to create distractions in exchange for cooperation. In spite of it all, l wouldn’t trade this for anything. Especially, when I’m drained from a hard day’s work and wonder how to keep up at playtime. Because another lesson awaits! He teaches me to be self content and motivated because somehow and I don’t know how, he manages to stay happy and amuse himself even if it means doing it on his own. In times like this, l wish he would never grow up. That he would eternalize these qualities because weren’t we all this special at some point? Yet we “adulted” and lost the sweet innocence that we all struggle to recover, quite never fully back.

A mom and Pediatrician at ❤️ @thrivingdoctor

Mentorship my Mantra FOR LIFE

So I was getting a quick orientation given that my first call as a pediatric cardiologist fellow was coming up. My Senior colleague went over my electronic medical record outline and made sure to set me with all the "tools I needed"... whether I agreed or not. Most items were super helpful in my "humble" opinion. But for others, I thought I was pretty set and already had things figured out. That's why I was quickly dismissive when she asked to show me how to manually calculate the QTc. I was like "meh, I'm good" "I'll just do it on the ECG reading software; doing it manually is too complicated and error-prone". But she insisted and showed me anyway. Turns out it wasn't that complicated, but I still proceeded to state that I would not use her method. Rude! And very inconsiderate given that she was going out of her way to do this. Later on, I appreciated her grace... 

Two days later, on call, I was consulted by a colleague who wanted a quick ECG intepretation on his patient. I found the patient's electronic chart, but there was no ECG! In my hospital, Cardiologists have an independent software where all ECGs are uploaded for formal intepretations (what I earlier alluded to). Certainly, I would find that ECG there and better yet the software tools would facilitate the job. 

 It wasn't there either! So I was stuck with reading an ECG that was nowhere to be found. 

If you've worked in the health care setting long enough, you know it takes very little for negative reports regarding your ability to "affect patient care" to start circulating. And I did not want any labels. 

As I was brainstorming, I suddenly had a light bulb moment. I called back my colleague and asked for a screenshot of the paper ECG. Although the ECG had not yet been uploaded in the patient's electronic chart, the paper copy was in the physical chart. So he emailed me the ECG while adhering to HIPAA regulations of privacy and confidentiality. Sigh of relief! Now I could read the ECG and right away, I could tell the QT interval looked prolonged. This meant calculating the QTc. I did not have the luxury of using my fancy software because the image was NOT uploaded. That meant doing it MANUALLY! I immediately flashed back to my initial encounter with my Senior Fellow and thanks to her method, got the answer I was looking for. 

 Mentorship is guidance provided by a more experienced counterpart in the same field. Needless to say, it can make your life easier because your mentor can save you from anticipated hardships and help you navigate the system. My Senior colleague was exercising mentorship. PEER mentorship, if I may add! Given that she had been in the same situation (new trainee) not long ago, she knew that having that information would make things easier. Not only was she a woman, but also a black female and immigrant in a very competitive specialty... just like me. She was, in the true sense of the word, looking out for me! 

 Turns out that ECG was abnormal and I was able to provide timely recommendations, which my Attending was quite pleased about. I immediately called my mentor and told what happened. I thanked and appreciated her. She hardly said much in return. All she wanted was for me to succeed and not make the same mistakes. This is mentorship. 

 Dedicated to all those who believe in mentorship...

Follow me on Instagram @thrivingdoctor

My Extraordinary (Medical) Adventures: Rise of the Working Mom (Part Two)

My Extraordinary (Medical) Adventures: Rise of the Working Mom (Part Two): When my son was born he was this fragile little being. His cry broke my heart. He was so small yet so powerful. His existence instantly tran...

Rise of the Working Mom (Part Two)

When my son was born he was this fragile little being. His cry broke my heart. He was so small yet so powerful. His existence instantly transformed and brought the best out of me. Things changed... like my driving; I stopped speeding. I exercised and ate better. I became more kind and generous.

 

When my maternity leave expired, it was time to go back to work...but I couldn't. I wouldn't. I couldn't think straight, my heart was pounding, my palms were sweaty. I knew I needed more time. I called my boss. I knew she was a mother and would understand. We talked and discussed options including extending my maternal leave of 8 weeks. She was supportive and encouraged me to take the time I needed. I was warned however, that I would have to make up any additional time. Pediatric residency is 3 years and any additional time outside of vacation and personal/sick day had to be made up.
I hated the thought of staying behind. As if it wasn't enough that repeating my entire intern year had already put me one year behind. Now I had to extend my residency for an additional 2 weeks. Initially frustrating, but the extra time with my son ended up being the best decision and I'm glad I had that support.

I don't know where I got the strength to go back. Everyday at work felt like a piece of me was ripped apart. It was painful. But with time, it became bearable. My baby grew and wasn't this fragile being anymore. He started sitting, babbling and crawling around. My nerves calmed down.

He is about to turn ONE. He is growing, cruising and chatting away. Now I ask "why did the time fly by"? LOL. I praise God for this journey and for teaching me patience. I have so much respect for Mothers. Mothers all over the world. Housewives. Working mothers. Single mothers. How do we do it??? Only God knows, but keep doing it!!!

Dedicated to ALL (working) MOTHERS...

Rise of The Working Mother (Part One)

I felt the gush of water down my cheeks as I walked down the stairs. By the time, I got to my car, I couldn't see anymore; tears had flooded my eyes. The cry of my baby boy was still vivid and it felt like someone was ripping my heart apart. He wanted to nurse, but I had to go to work. He didn't want a piece of rubber in his mouth; he wanted his mother! I had pumped and saved milk before returning to work, and I felt pretty good about that. I never expected this wasn't enough! It started like a joke. First time, he rejected the bottle and I was so confused. When he kept rooting towards my chest, I knew he was definitely hungry. I put him on my breast and he nursed away.
Now I was driving to work, crying and asking myself why on earth would I take care of others' kids when I couldn't even breastfeed mine. It was so hard! I wiped my face, got to work and checked my schedule. No patients yet. Still feeling upset, I knew I only had a few minutes to "fix" myself so I went to my confidante, also a mother. It wasn't long before she knew something was wrong and I broke down in uncontrollable sobs. She gave me a hug and started praying for me. I heard her asking God for strength and I realized that I definitely needed that. I realized that it's hard to be a mother...especially a working one in America. My maternity leave lasted 8 weeks, 2 weeks more than the average time in several residency programs. Boy, was I naive to think that would suffice! But that's the norm in America. While our counterparts around the world nurture their babies from 6 to 12 months, we're rushing to work after 6 to 12 weeks. We have effectively numbed ourselves to our babies' feelings and their innate needs...in order to meet demands of society! My little one was acting perfectly normal and not being able to oblige broke my heart.
Somehow, I felt much better. Perhaps I needed a hug and some loving from someone who knew better. Someone who could say "Obi will be fine; go be you!" I dried the tears and went out there and did my thing. This is the life I chose (no regrets) and now that I have a little one, I value being a pediatrician more than ever. Obi eventually took his bottle and when I came home, he flashed the biggest smile at his mother. If there was anything rewarding that entire day, it was that moment!!!


Dedicated to all (working) mothers...

The complexity of learning

One day, I called a Practicing physician (a doctor done with residency training) to give a report on a common patient that was under my care. I’ve done this several times before so I thought this would be the least of my problems.

After brief pleasantries, I started presenting the patient. I was quickly interrupted. The doctor wanted me to expand on something I’d mentioned. Truth is this info hadn’t been relevant to my working diagnosis so I’d not pursued it in my history-taking.
The doctor asked the first question. I didn’t have the answer. 2nd question I didn’t have the answer either. I could feel her temper rising. The 3rd blunder and then came the boiling point. I was told that my sign out was “unacceptable for a resident in a teaching hospital” followed by a click.

After 5sec of reflection, I redirected my attention back to my patient. I really felt like I’d prepared, but the doctor clearly, didn’t feel that way. I had to equip myself and call her back. When I did, the conversation was still dicey, but at least, she let me finish this time. After sensing my tone, she said she was only trying to help me.

I have so much appreciation for all my teachers. So much more for those who are humble and don’t feel the need to demean anybody. Yes, I’m all about learning, but not by ridiculing me. If that’s the only way then I’d would rather not learn...from you.
They say you develop tough skin. I feel bad for people who have to degrade others to make themselves feel better. If you have to debase someone in order to elevate yourself I think you need a psychiatric evaluation. It’s not normal.

I did go back to my work, but I learnt that you can never be prepared enough. I’ve been doing this for a few years and every time I get comfortable, something new happens. And that’s the beauty of learning-it never ends! And if you let anyone take that away from you, that's a disservice to yourself.